It’s back-to-school season. For parents, that means new clothes, school supplies, fall sports registrations, activity fees and the inevitable last-minute trip to the store for something you forgot.
As you watch all of those expenses add up, have you ever stopped to think about what it actually costs to raise a child?
According to a 2025 study by SmartAsset, Massachusetts ranked as the most expensive state in the country to raise a young child. Using data from the MIT Living Wage Calculator, the study estimated that two working parents face an additional $44,221 per year in costs associated with raising one young child, including childcare, housing, food, transportation, healthcare and other necessities.
If a family experienced that same level of spending for 18 years, it would total nearly $800,000 per child, and that is before college. This number also does not include private school or extensive extracurriculars.
Of course, families don’t spend the same amount every year. Childcare can make the early years particularly expensive, and those costs may decline significantly once children enter school. But other expenses replace that cost.
Daycare becomes summer camp. Then come sports, activities, technology, bigger grocery bills and family travel. Before long, you may be adding a first car, insurance and college to the list.
If your children play competitive sports or participate in multiple activities, those costs can climb even faster. Travel teams, private coaching, camps, equipment, hotels and tournament travel can push the cost of raising a child considerably higher.
The expenses change, they do not necessarily disappear
One of the biggest challenges of raising children is that the expenses are constantly evolving.
No one receives one giant bill for raising a child. Instead, the costs arrive little by little over 18 years and beyond, making it easy to focus on today’s expenses without considering what may be coming next.
That’s where planning ahead can make a meaningful difference.
Know your family’s real number
Rather than focusing solely on national or state averages, determine what your family actually spends.
Add up sports fees, equipment, lessons, camps, clothing, school activities, birthday parties, dining out, entertainment and travel.
A sport, for example, may have a $500 registration fee, but that does not necessarily include equipment, uniforms, lessons, tournaments, hotels or travel.
Looking at these expenses over an entire year can provide a much clearer picture of what raising your children actually costs.
Think about the next stage
Parents should also consider what the next three to five years may bring.
If daycare is ending next year, could some of that money may be redirected toward a 529 college savings plan or retirement?
If your 12-year-old may need a car in four years, could you begin setting aside money today?
If your child loves a sport that may eventually involve competitive teams and travel, how might 0that affect your future budget?
Anticipating these transitions can turn future expenses into planned expenses.
Decide what matters most
Parents naturally want to give their children every opportunity. But saying yes to everything can quickly put pressure on other financial goals.
Every family has to decide what matters most.
The same applies to college. Do you hope to pay the entire cost? A percentage? Undergraduate tuition but not graduate school? Will your child contribute?
There is no universally correct answer. Setting expectations early can help parents determine how much they should save while also teaching children that financial resources have limits.
Don’t forget about your own future
Perhaps the most important balancing act is providing for your children without compromising your own financial security.
It can be tempting to reduce retirement savings when childcare, sports or tuition bills feel more immediate. But remember your children will likely not support your retirement. It is like what they say on an airplane, put your own mask on before others. You want to make sure that you are financially secure for the future.
Leave room for surprises. Emergency savings and flexibility can help prevent an unexpected expense from disrupting your larger plan.
Ultimately, there is no single number that captures the true cost of raising a child. Every family will make different choices based on its lifestyle, priorities and resources.
Financial planning is not about predicting every dollar you’ll spend over 18 years. It’s about understanding what matters to your family, anticipating the major expenses ahead and making sure today’s decisions don’t come at the expense of tomorrow’s financial security.
Emily Promise, CEO and financial advisor at ShorePoint Advisory Group (formerly Blakely Financial), is a Marblehead native and the financial columnist for the Current.
