I am not a great cook, I use box mixes to bake, I am terrible at planning ahead … and I am a mom of three who loves to host gatherings. Nothing makes me happier or more grateful than looking around my home when it’s bursting with my kids and their friends, the sound of laughter and roughhousing, and lots of food and play. My kids are older now (17, 15 and 11), but even when they were little, one of my favorite things was opening our doors to lots of kids and parents for play, art, food and drinks. Here are a few tricks I used when they were little to get the kids settled so that the adults could actually have a conversation or two!
Butcher paper tablecloths
Ditch the fancy linen and use butcher paper as your tablecloth. Not only is it affordable and easy to clean up, but it also serves as a giant canvas for kids and their grown-ups (even the adults can’t resist a doodle or two when the paper is out and the crayons are there). Scatter crayons and stickers across the table and the kids will draw and decorate. This can be particularly helpful for children who need time to warm up to the crowd. It gives them something to do with their hands and they can focus on creating instead of feeling uncomfortable. During the meal, it will keep children engaged and allow adults to savor their meals a bit longer.
Outdoor appetizers and play
If weather allows, even if it is a little cold, set up snack tables outside. Provide outdoor activities like chalk, a football or kickball, and wheeled toys. This gets kids playing and expending energy, while adults can mingle. Plus, it eases the crowding in the kitchen during those last-minute meal preparations.
Food
Regardless of whether you are serving a formal holiday meal or a potluck, ease your guests’ worries about picky eaters by prepping a lot of kid-friendly sides. Think mac and cheese cups, pasta with butter, bread, crackers, fruit cups, etc. This way, your guests can relax and not stress over what their kids are eating (or not eating) during the party. Make extra because grown-ups love kid foods, too!
Involve your kids in prep
Involve your kids in the preparation. Anticipation is half the fun, especially when you are little! In the days leading up to the event, ask your children what kind of jobs they want to help with. For example, collecting and putting coats away, looking out for children who need help getting started playing and offering to play with them, making decorations ahead of time, etc. Giving your kids real jobs helps them feel big and important, which will impact their behavior.
Interactive dessert making station
Create a dessert station where kids can get hands-on in preparing their own treats. Offer simple ingredients for them to mix and match. Think fruit skewers, sugar cookies with frosting and various sprinkles to decorate, or pre-scooped ice cream in cups with toppings to choose from. If weather permits, a bonfire with smores is always a hit with kids and adults!
Holiday PJs and movie marathon
Before the event, encourage parents to bring PJs for the kids. Once dinner is done and the dishes are cleared, settle the kids down with a holiday-themed movie. This can be the perfect wind-down activity and give adults the chance to relax or catch up with each other. Check commonsensemedia.org for the ratings you can trust on what’s appropriate.
Expect at least some amount of chaos with kids around. It wouldn’t be a party without at least a few meltdowns …
Lizzie Assa is founder of The Workspace for Children, a parenting strategist, play expert and mother of three who lives in Marblehead.
